Change your beliefs about yourself 

 August 26, 2019

Did you know that changing your beliefs change change your life? If you're stuck, it's not the tools or your actions that need to change. Do you find yourself trying different things to achieve your goals or changing your behavior to bring something new to your life? But, no matter how hard you try, it just seems like nothing is working?

Today, we’re talking about specifically what needs to change and how to change it so that you can stop repeating the same patterns over and over again.


I have a friend who I watch repeat negative patterns over and over...it seems that no matter what she does, she is always struggling and not able to get what she wants in her life. 

I'll give you a pretty big hint here....this issue isn't our outward actions so much as it is your thoughts and beliefs. Change your beliefs and you'll instantly change your life. 

Get off the hamster wheel of false beliefs!

Let me give you a few examples of what I'm talking about.

Example #1: Let's say you are in the dating game and you're trying to find the perfect husband or wife. You keep meeting people, going out on dates and starting relationships. They seem like they're great in the beginning but then something happens and you realize it is not a good decision and you don’t want to be with this person.

Example #2: Maybe you have a particular goal to get in shape, release some weight, or earn a certain amount of money. You keep trying different things, using different tools and following different programs, but you keep ending up in the same place and nothing seems to change.

Pay attention when you see those patterns happening over and over and over again.

Where in your life do you see these repeating patterns?

We tend to think that a tool, program or person didn’t work for us and wasn't a good fit, yet we keep repeating the same patterns over and over again.

In fact, that's exactly how most things are marketed to us! We are told that we need this new tool and it will change our lives.

Tools don't change your life

I've seen this emphasis recently on the tool because I’ve been updating my planner. It's that time of year and I'm reassessing how things have gone so far and what I want to change for the next part of the year.

I create my own planner. I take inspiration from other planners, but there are so many out there and they all tell you that theirs is the best because their creators are so proud of them.

“If you just use this planner, your life will dramatically change,” they claim. I agree that tools are incredibly important and you have to have the right tools for what you want to achieve, but it's not the tool that is responsible for your growth.

It's not the tool that is responsible for your growth.

If you are not getting what you want, it's not because of something external. It's because of something internal within yourself.

Your beliefs change your life

That was a biggie....did you catch it?

If you are not getting what you want, it's not because of something external. It's because of something internal.

This understanding can be very difficult to accept initially. You might think that there is something wrong with you, that you're just broken and need to be fixed or that you're just not capable. However, with that thinking, you're never going to have what you want.

None of these things are true. These are all lies that we have internalized to varying degrees. We tend to believe them, but they are not true statements about who we are.

Let's go back to the example from the beginning of trying to find a spouse. If you keep attracting a certain type of partner, it has nothing to do with those individuals. Instead, it’s simply a reflection to you that there are things within yourself that you need to change.

One of my mentors I absolutely love, Jim Rohn, said, “For things to improve, you have to improve. For things to get better, you have to get better. And for things to change, you have to change. When you change, everything in your world will change.”

He's not the only one to have said this...and it’s so true. If you want to achieve your goals, it's not about the tool, it’s about who you are internally and who you are becoming in the process. If you want to attract different things, people and experiences into your life, you need to change who you believe you are.

You attract what you believe

Let's talk about a very specific thing that you can implement.

The scriptures tell us over and over again, that if we ask, then we will receive. However, there's one other really important piece of asking and receiving that is often forgotten. We have to believe that we can receive it.

That belief will make the difference. It gets to the core of who you believe you are, what you think your value is and what you think you deserve. You will only attract the experiences, people, amount of money, jobs, etc. that line up with your belief of what you think you are worth and what you think you deserve.

What do you believe about yourself? 

The easy part is that there's only one thing you have to change - your belief about yourself!

When I was mowing the lawn the other day, I spent the entire hour repeating affirmations. Yes, literally the entire hour that I mowed my lawn, I said my affirmations to myself and, every time I got off track, I just came back to them.

(I actually like to make the affirmations into songs. It makes it more fun, easier and helps to ingrain those beliefs more firmly within your being when you add some music to them.)

By the time I got about halfway through my lawn, these statements had changed my self-worth. I started thinking of things in my life and realizing I deserve better than this or that.

Change your beliefs about yourself

Let's say that you are earning $60,000 a year and you have the belief that you deserve it.

But let's say that you want to earn half a million dollars. If you're not there yet, you have to first develop the belief that you deserve that $500,000 a year. In that case, the only thing that you have to change is your belief about yourself and what you are worth.

From an intellectual standpoint, it's very easy to say, I have infinite worth! And you do - we are these beautiful creations of God,  full of love, light and power. But we don't usually believe we are and often tend to forget who we truly are.

How to find out what you really believe about yourself:

  • Take some time in meditation, journaling, visualizing or whatever process works for you. Settle yourself down, take some breaths, let things get quiet.
  • Ask yourself, “What do I believe I deserve? Do I believe that I deserve this particular relationship, or this particular income or this particular job?”
  • Whatever it is that you really want, just ask yourself if you believe you deserve it and are worth it. Allow whatever comes to you to come and acknowledge that you might be surprised at some areas where you have a very high sense of belief in yourself, deserving, and self-worth and other areas where it's much lower. This is completely normal.

Life-changing affirmations

Once you've realized where your true level of belief is and what you think you deserve, the next step is simple: create an affirmation, which is a new statement or a declaration of belief about who you are and what you deserve.

Here are examples of affirmations to change your belief in what you deserve:

  • I am a pure spirit of light and love.
  • I am full of joy.
  • I am worth it.
  • I am valuable.
  • I am loved.

Notice how simple they are. These statements do not need to be long. They're powerful because they are true....you just need repetition to get that belief deeply seated within you.

Choose something that resonates with you and then repeat it over and over again. Eventually, it will sink in to all of your cells so deeply in your body that you will start to believe it. You will know the process is working because you’ll feel different, you will act differently and you will attract different things into your life. You will start seeing your life change.

Let me reiterate, if you have tried multiple tools to make changes in your life and things are just not working, don't give up.

It's not the tools, it's your sense of your self-worth, which you can absolutely change by just doing this one simple thing.

Choose your new statement of belief and repeat it over and over again.

Take time during your day to sit down for 30 seconds or a minute, close your eyes and just repeat it as many times as you can in that time frame. Repeat it with as much emotion and feeling as you can, which is why I like to sing it. Singing brings out the emotion.

You can also visualize yourself being that person. How does your life look now that you have that new job? What does that relationship look like with this new person? What are your interactions like? Envision him or her treating you the way that you deserve to be treated.

If needed, write it out by hand as many times as needed to get it into yourself each day.

Repeat your new affirmation over and over until you feel different and attract better things.

The key is to realize that the power within yourself is already there to make the changes needed to welcome whatever you want into your life.

The tools are wonderful, helpful and necessary so keep using them. But choose a new affirmation, a new declaration, a statement of truth about who you are, and get that deeply imprinted into your soul!

You will continually want to revisit it. Without too much time or effort, you will hit a new level of belief in yourself and what you deserve, what you are capable of and what you're going to welcome into your life. Then, you're going to be ready for more growth.

It's going to seem like you’ve already been here and fixed this before.

Keep in mind, it's not about fixing something but continually progressing and growing. So as you become ready for the next step and the next growth cycle in your life, you'll need to revisit those affirmations. They might sound different the next time around but that just means it’s time for the next step.

Repeat your affirmation(s) to yourself daily until you believe them and the tools will become much more effective for you. My shift only took 30 minutes. I want to hear how it works for you! Let me know in the comments below!

Changing your beliefs about yourself

  • Repeating negative patterns in your life are a sign you have some beliefs that need to change.
  • Tools are helpful, but only when you have the right belief.
  • Choose a simple affirmation and repeat it with emotion until you see the patterns in your life change.

What changed in your life when you created a new belief about yourself?

The affirmation secrets that every Christian entrepreneur must know

Success is 95% mindset. Get your FREE copy of Affirmation Secrets for Christian Entrepreneurs to take your business from puttering along to overflowing with an abundance of income and clients!

About the author

Jen Bessire, PhD, is a Christian medium, author, and healer. After 23 years as a physical therapist, God called her to her current path in 2014. She delights in helping others come unto Christ, heal generational trauma, and create a life of freedom. God is calling you - are you listening?

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