How to discover and strengthen your desires 

 March 13, 2023

Your desires are seeking you. That sounds great, but how do you discover your desires? There are many things seeking to be expressed through us in this physical world. This conversation with a spirit guide can help you understand your desires, and how to strengthen your desires.


Your desires matter

"Desire is the starting point of all achievement," says Napoleon Hill in his book Think and Grow Rich.

In the Bible, we are told over and over to seek and to ask for what we want.

In the Book of Mormon, when Nephi wanted to understand the vision of the tree of life, the angel who appeared to him asked, "What desirest thou?" (1 Ne 11:2)

It is our desires that move us forward. It is our desires that shape who we are and who we become, and give us our identity. When we have a desire, then we can make a choice about what to do next.

Are your desires yours?

The first time I went through a coaching program to create what I wanted, I struggled a lot with this issue of desire. I didn't really have much desire for anything, it seemed, because of my upbringing. It took a lot of effort just to find desire and nurture it. Because of this, I have spent a lot of time pondering about desires, and working to understand which desires are truly mine and which were given to me by others.

We all have this conflict to sort out, to varying degrees. Is what you want something that YOU truly want, or is it a desire of your parents? Or of society? The more we learn about ourselves, about what we like and dislike, the more clear our desires become. It gets easier to discover them among all the other noise and programming from our childhood.

Where do our desires come from?

But, where do our desires come from? What is the difference between a fleeting desire, and a more persistent one? And as a healer and coach who so often deals with boundaries, I have wondered, how do we know if a desire is truly ours or someone else's?

Here's something else to think about with desires...there are desires all around us, looking for a way to be expressed and created in this material plane.

Thoughts are things, meaning they are energy. So these thoughts and ideas surround us, seeking expression.

Figuring out what we truly want, what we desire, can be difficult. It's critically important, though! Without a desire, nothing happens. It's the first step we need to grow, to move forward, to reach a goal.

How do we discover our desires, and then strengthen those desires?

I wanted to understand these things more, so I pondered and prayed about it. I had a series of conversations with a spirit guide named Jordan. Jordan taught me about who I am and where our desires come from.

Here I'm sharing our conversation about desires. I'll elaborate on some of what he said after the conversation.

A spirit guide teaches about desire

Jordan: Everything you seek is within you. They are intelligences seeking expression. As you feed them, they grow - like more lights gathering together to increase their presence. If you ignore a desire long enough, it will leave and find some other place where it can receive expression. 

Jen: So they’re not really mine then? It is more like who I am is fluid?

Jordan: Yes and no. This is where discernment and coming within comes in. There are intelligences and desires that are inherent to who you are. There are others that are less so. And even others that stop by, looking for a place where they can be expressed. Your task is to learn to discern which ones to give life to. It is most important to find and give life to those that are inherently “you.”

Jen: How do I learn the difference?

Jordan: Those that are inherently yours are always there, so you will feel their insistence throughout your life. Of course, it is possible to ignore them or to have little awareness of them. The ones that are stopping by and looking for expression may feel very strong, but they won’t persist. If they’re not expressed quickly, they move on.

Jen: These desires, are they more general, or are there some that are quite specific? Are there particular laws governing them that would help me?

Jordan: Ah! Excellent question. Yes, there are laws. The desires can make themselves known, but they must respect your agency. They will never force their expression. You must seek for them, and bring them forth. They will show themselves as thoughts, or images, or strong feelings. Not fleeting or passing feelings, but ones that persist. Follow them, and you will feel free and joy. Ignoring these desires and clues brings sadness.

Jen: How do I facilitate bringing forth these deep desires?

Jordan: Seek after them. Talk to them. Listen. Be persistent. While they are strong, they are also not very vocal at first, because their light isn’t bright, there are only few of them. As you continually seek, more are lit up within you and their light becomes brighter.

How to discover your desires

In my conversation with him, Jordan mentioned "intelligences." This is a concept I first learned about from my faith (see definition 3). Then, I also heard Bob Proctor talk about it, from a book called The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles. These intelligences are individual particles, if you will, that are responsive to our wishes/commands. They want to be expressed. 

Our desires start out small, as an individual intelligence. As we nurture it, through visualization or by expressing it through words or action, it grows. It grows by attracting other intelligences to it.

Like Jordan said, we need to give heed to the things that we're drawn to. What sparks your interest? What makes your heart feel light? If you're not sure, get into a quiet place and take some time to think about it. Imagine different things, and notice what you feel. 

This is an ongoing process, not a one time event! Personally, I've found that I have resisted my inherent desires because they don't fit into who I thought I was and what I grew up believing. Give yourself some grace as you learn to accept these desires.

How to strengthen your desires

Also, as Jordan taught, we must seek after our desires. We need to strengthen them, to nourish them. Napoleon Hill teaches this in Think and Grow Rich. Once we have a desire, Hill instructs the reader to spend time daily visualizing that desire. As we do so, our desire is strengthened, and so is our faith. Eventually, taking action to acquire this desire become easy.

As always, to truly grow and express who we are, we need to find quiet time to ponder, pray, and meditate. We need to take time to be with ourselves and with God, to know who we are. 

Take note of your desires. Both the passing ones, and the persistent, strong ones. Seek after them, talk with them even. Find out more about what you truly desire, and then give yourself time to nurture those desires. As you do so, your path will become more and more clear.

Main image by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay

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About the author

Jen Bessire, PhD, is a Christian medium, author, and healer. After 23 years as a physical therapist, God called her to her current path in 2014. She delights in helping others come unto Christ, heal generational trauma, and create a life of freedom. God is calling you - are you listening?

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